Tag Archives: Forgiving

I Love You Too Lord


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Oh how that “charcoal fire” burned into my conscious the sins I had committed against You my Spouse, through the times before I knew You my Lord and my God. My sins ever before me, burning with painful chains which held me from You. Unable to see You in the Fire of Love, unable to see You suffering for me.

Today my Lord, today, you have come to me, in Love, that I may love and live again in You. My sins burned away, leaving only You remaining, for me to follow You.

Thank you Lord, I love You too.

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Lent 2017


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What shall I do? I will do as our Holy Mother Mary told us at the very start.

If we are to be His servants, and we are to serve, what must we do?? Do what our beautiful Mama Mary told us :

“His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.” John 2:5

And what was the first thing our Lord told us to do?:

“Repent and believe in the gospel”

Praying the Gospel. Gnawing on it. Reading, pondering, over and over. Letting Him soak into the deep within. God willing.

Please listen to this wonderful homily from Fr. Anthony this morning on EWTN.

(If the video does not play from the beginning, you will have to fix that manually. as for some technical reason, its not playing the full Gospel & homily)

 

 

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The Last Mission


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Its been very interesting, to say the least, this Easter Week. I have once again been struggling with health issues and have finally been diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure.

A year ago, when it was time for me to step aside from all my duties at my old parish, I had told my pastor at that time, our Lord was calling me to go home. Our Lord was telling me to spend time with my children and family. I struggled so hard with that message. Now I feel He is telling me why. He has made Himself very visible in the last few weeks, although He has made Himself very visible in all aspects of my entire life, this time, it is as if He is tying everything together and everything I do, say, see and hear, I see He is there.

For close to 17 years, He has shown me through His grace, all that I had done to Him. Now, He is showing me all the things I have done for Him.

In my diagnosis, from Tuesday, I went from a diagnosis from having pneumonia and a possible Pulmonary Embolism, to entering into the ER and finding out about the fluid surrounding my heart and a little damage to the left side, although I had not had a heart attack. Thus I was given the diagnosis of Congestive Heart Failure. Not having a Pulmonary Embolism or pneumonia at all. I actually laugh at how they did not know. How they try to shove you into some mold that everyone should fit, because of such & such. Don’t get me wrong, I forgive them, and I know my Lord is my true Doctor, and no two are ever carbon copies but what He created us to be.

What I need to say today is complete consolation from our Lord. Through this beautiful conversion of heart, with my Lord’s grace, I am pondering, relishing and digging into a vast well of joy. I am coming to grips with how He has used me and changed me, has forgiven me and truly loves me. Just as He loves each of us. I am surrounded by His arms.

I called my old pastor and he came to my home and anointed me and another good friend came and brought me our Lord in the Eucharist. Both visits, had nothing to do with me. Nor will anything else. It’s about everyone else. It’s about Him. It’s about time and we do not have much of it, and it all belongs to Him. Everything is His.

When my visitors left, I was looking around talking to our Lord. My eyes came to one wall in my living room. Immediately, I knew what He was telling me. That entire sinful world I created, I lived and turned away from, was completely contained while what He has done is now my freedom to fully enjoy. How did I see this? The picture above is that wall. It’s not was is on the wall, it’s what is now contained and no longer free. That cage on the table, contains a snake. A snake that my cat dragged in (sparking, Lion of Judah) that I tossed into a cage and sealed up. (It’s a long story and she was hurt) Symbolism people, don’t call anyone about animal cruelty. hahah

When I see the symbolism of the “snake” (my old sins and tormentor) and I see it now totally contained, no longer free, unable to escape and hurt me and I see the pictures of all that I love, free and everywhere, and I hear the words of our Lord in my heart, there is no more doubt, there is no more anxiety, there is no more questioning, there is only a major consolation from our Lord telling me, yes you did capture and get rid of what I needed you to get rid of. This is the heart of repenting. I don’t expect anyone to understand this because He is sharing this with me and to understand it, you would have to know every second of my life.. It truly has been Him and I hear Him saying, You did it! I say back to my Lord, You did it Lord.

Now on to this Last Mission. Nothing is about me. He told me to spend the rest of my time with my family, that is the mission I am on now. I love them so much and it is a matter of teaching them now, be not afraid. Live the faith, not the world. This is what Divine Mercy is all about. Not looking at the consolations our Lord is giving to us as mine, but to see them in yourself, to give to others.

Pax Domini
All glory and honor to God

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My Cross


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We all have many crosses our Lord has handed to us in this life. Not one is equal to the next nor equal to someone else’s that they must carry. They are similar in appearance but in how we carry them, comes with each of our lives and the things we encounter daily, and how we accept our Lords cross in how we carry them. We can choose to place more weight on them with a standard that our Lord Himself would never place on us, or we can simply look at the cross He carried and accept that no matter how heavy ours may be, His was and is, the only one that matters. It does not mean we place our crosses down, but rather pick them up with hope in Him that He will always be there to help us carry them with much greater ease.

In my daily walk I find myself looking to Mama Mary and the cross she was handed the day she said yes to Abba Father. That simple yes to God’s will brought not only our Lord into all our lives, but the weight of His cross added onto Mama Mary’s life. She became one again not only maternally but spiritually. They become one not only as a mother and child as she carried Him in her womb, but the entire span of His life with her, and all of us, even now. There is no doubt she was told all that would take place in the life of her Son and our Lord. Holding all this in her heart daily, until He came for her at her assumption.

The day my conversion began, started with a yes. In my heart, a yes to Abba Father and no other. With my yes to Abba Father, came a yes to ALL He wills. Good, bad, makes no difference as the outcome is always good for His will to be made manifest into our lives. I would love to sit here and say it’s almost as if” our Lord has had His watchful eye on me every step I have taken, since this all began, but, to say that is bringing doubt into the picture. Rather, I know for a fact, our Lord has had His watchful eye on me every step I have taken, since this all began as everything told to me that day my conversion began, has been taking place daily, after the fact of me being able to see it. Therefore seeing Him at work in my life at every turn, at every step. Knowing without a doubt, He is here. Not knowing exactly what I am to do with this but only to accept it as it came with my yes, to Abba Father.

I place all the same hope that Mama Mary had at the uttering of the word yes, to my end so to spend eternity with my Lord and her with all the holy Angels and Saints of our Lord Jesus Christ. With much less perfection as I am not full of grace, but am only as full as Abba Father has allowed me to be through His merciful Son. Not equating myself to her in any way, but seeing her as the perfect soul to emulate in a world of imperfection.

When we look at our Lord on the crucifix, it’s very difficult to look at our own cross and with a clear heart and mind to utter the words, mine is much greater. It’s actually laughable to even think that somehow my cross could be heavier than theirs. Therefore making my cross a simple paper crucifix that I have been called to carry. The Words of our Lord on that simple cross carry the weight and the Holy Spirit of our Lord keeps it all in check to ensure, the glory is given to Him, for the glory and honor of all I have seen, lived and encountered throughout my entire life, belongs to the most Holy and Divine Trinity.

When we undergo so many trials and suffering in this life, its meant for all of us cast our eyes upon Him on His beautiful cross and to pull closer to Him to listen to His Word. We do not belong here to stay for eternity but only belong with Him in paradise.

Today is the Triumph of the Cross. May we all simply say yes Abba Father, and do all He has asked of us. To love and serve Him in all that we do, every day we are here in exile.

September 14

The Exaltation of the Holy Cross

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“Have this mind among yourselves, which was in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form he humbled himself and became obedient unto death, even death on a cross,” (Phil.2:5-8). [1]

Today we honor the Exaltation of the Holy Cross and Jesus’ triumph upon it. In today’s feast, we are reminded of God’s plan of Salvation and His work to raise up humankind through the saving power of Jesus Christ. In Christ on the Cross, sin is overcome and we are offered a new life, with Christ at the center. According to a traditional account, the relics of the holy cross were discovered by St. Helena, mother of Constantine the Great, in 326 when she was on a pilgrimage in Jerusalem. The relics were captured by Persians but later returned in 628 and now reside at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre. [2][3][4]

Written by Sarah Ciotti
Reviewed by Fr. Hugh Feiss, OSB, STD
[1]Revised Standard Version s.v., “Philippians, The Letter of Saint Paul to the.”
[2] Catholicpedia: The Original Catholic Encyclopedia (1917) for iPhone, iPad, and iPod Touch. s.v. “Archeology of the Cross and Crucifix.”
[3] Benedict XVI, Homily, September 15, 2008.
[4] John Paul II, Homily, September 14, 1988.

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