Tag Archives: Fortitude

Pure JOY Through Suffering


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The 21’st of September, 1996, was the day I realized I was about to lose my dad to lung cancer, and he entered eternal life on the feast of St. Padre Pio, two days later. It was the day I would come to realized, I was adopted by our Lord. Suffering brings JOY.

At his side, on his bed, I said out loud, I need to change my life. The life I was living, to quote our Holy Father, was “kaka”.

Anyway, someone had posted this tweet and it stirred in me. I remember. I remember it well. From death, to new life. Today, I sing.

Notice the picture in this post: A Leopard In The Well and reflect on what our LORD has done.

Repent and believe

Ephesians 2 

St. Padre Pio, pray for us.

The song? The song? “September” is a song by the American band Earth, Wind & Fire. It was recorded during the sessions for their album I Am

“Do you remember
The 21st night of September?
Love was changin’ the minds of pretenders
While chasin’ the clouds away
Our hearts were ringin’
In the key that our souls were singin’
As we danced in the night, remember
How the stars stole the night away, oh, yeah yeah yeah”

 

St. Matthew Prayer

O Glorious St. Matthew, in your Gospel you portray Jesus as the longed-for Messiah who fulfilled the Prophets of the Old Covenant and as the new Lawgiver who founded a Church of the New Covenant.
Obtain for us the grace to see Jesus living in his Church and to follow his teachings in our lives on earth so that we may live forever with him in heaven.

Edit to add:

As I was heading to bed just now, I heard music coming from outside… Someone finally gets it… The echo of September, somehow, somewhere. Thank you Lord.

 

 

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Trusting The Spouse Of Our Souls


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When trust is broken, as a wife, I come to understand that the LORD is in this Marriage Trinity, and it is He who is the Spouse of our souls, the Bridegroom who NEVER breaks the trust. Who does not stray. As my husband may through temptation, I adhere to the Lord even when my husband may stray, praying for his repentance! Praying for his return.

Such as it is the same, for the shepherds who stray.

I ponder Psalms, chapter 116

I kept faith, even when I said,

“I am greatly afflicted!”

I said in my alarm,

“All men are liars!”

How can I repay the LORD

for all the great good done for me?

I will raise the cup of salvation

and call on the name of the LORD.

I will pay my vows to the LORD

in the presence of all his people.

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Solitude And Trust


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Make straight the way of the Lord‘” (John 1:23)

When we think of solitude, we often have fear of some desolate confinement as in a prison, or state of bleak and dismal emptiness. When we are separated from our Lord, it is, but when we are not, and trust in Him, it becomes a wonder filled place of extreme joy. The interior of the soul can be a beat up dirty place, but our Lord is there to help you clean it up, and decorate your life with all that good.

The very meaning of  blessed “solitude” is that of peace. “O blessed solitude,” exclaims St. Jerome, “in which God with loving condescension deals familiarly with chosen souls!” It is in this place, the soul leans on humility and not pride, coming to grips with that which is not right and just, is cast out, if we respond as our Holy Mother, and her humility, “let it be done to me according to your word”. It is the place which we learn as St. John the Baptist, how to let the me, step aside and allow Him to complete. ‘He must increase, but I must decrease.”

Solitude is a place for which I have come to enjoy, in which all the excitement within my soul, good and bad, becomes still, (Psalm 46:10) and places a firm Trust, in our Lord. Heeding to His Way, Life and Truth, casting aside what may be my own diversions and disorders. It is the heart of pure contemplation in which the pure heart, most certainly sees her Lord.

When trust is broken among family, friends, co-workers, religious leaders, presidents, children and even spouses, we can take courage in knowing that when we place our trust FIRMLY in our Lord, it is only He who has never broken the trust. We find Him always where we left Him. Waiting for us.

“I don’t trust you” has become a chant in every day life to which I can say in love, Good! Don’t trust me. Look to our Lord and remember His Word, “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You trust in God, trust also in me”. 

`Come away with me. Let us go alone to a quiet place and rest for a while.’ “Our Hearts are Restless Until They Rest in You” From the Confessions Saint Augustine of Hippo. “Pray without ceasing.”

In the midst of chaos and troubles, He is there to quiet the storm within the soul.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight” – Proverbs 3:5-6

In all the times we find ourselves “feeling” so alone and no one is there to help. Call on our Lord, He is with you always.

 

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World Day of Prayer for Vocations


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I may be preaching to the choir with this post, but I’m going to say it anyway.

The more faith in our Lord blooms, into adulthood, the more the soul desires just Him.

Where you are, is where He has called you to follow Him. I have shared many posts in regards to how I have felt that our Lord originally called me to religious life, as a Nun, as my desire in youth was strongly headed in that direction, but, with a well formed conscious, the soul comes to realize the fact that if our Lord wanted me in that Vocation, I would be there today. Can I justify leaving my husband and children behind to peruse a Religious Vocation, in which I “feel” our Lord is call me to? No. That would be a serious error and a giving into a spiritual attack by the enemy. Fortitude is an important key in all Vocations. A Religious Vocation does not destroy the family. It nurtures the Family. The Vocation of Marriage, with Christ as the Spouse, the Head of the Church, is also the Head of the Household in the Vocation of Marriage. There is no difference in that He is the Spouse of the Home. He provides for, leads and strengthens the family.

Can I then say how sad it is when a Priest or Sister, leaves his or her Spouse, being the entire Church, to pursue a different Vocation, after they have taken a Vow as Priest or Nun, Sister, etc.? These souls who are under serious spiritual attack, I pray for. Just as I pray for the strengthening  the Vocation of the bonds of Marriage.

From the USCCB:

The purpose of the World Day of Prayer for Vocations is to publicly fulfill the Lord’s instruction to, “Pray the Lord of the harvest to send laborers into his harvest” (Mt 9:38; Lk 10:2). As a climax to a prayer that is continually offered throughout the Church, it affirms the primacy of faith and grace in all that concerns vocations to the priesthood and to the consecrated life.  While appreciating all vocations, the Church concentrates its attention this day on vocations to the ordained ministries(priesthood and diaconate), to the Religious life in all its forms (male and female, contemplative and apostolic), to societies of apostolic life, to secular institutes in their diversity of services and membership, and to the missionary life, in the particular sense of mission “ad gentes”.

2018 marks the 55th Anniversary of the World Day of Prayer for Vocations

Resources for the World Day of Prayer for Vocations

World Day of Prayer will be observed on Sunday, April 22nd, Good Shepard Sunday. I pray for family’s to allow their children to grow in our Catholic faith, and not be discouraged by the world in which we are only here for a short time.  I pray for parents to grow in faith, and teach their Children to love and worship our Lord, to grow in reverence for all things holy.  I pray for parents that they may not put out the fire of our Lord growing larger in their children, His children, due to the parents desire for a different life that they want for them, full of material things that can not fill the desire within the heart. I pray for Parents, to grow in faith, to share the bond of our Lord with the entire family, in love, for Love.

Encourage Vocations, not discourage. Build up, not tear down. Never bite the Hand that feeds you.

The family that prays together stays together” and “A world at prayer is a world at peace“. – Venerable Father Patrick Peyton, C.S.C.

 

 

 

 

 

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Pentecost 2017


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As we celebrate Pentecost, I am filled with reflections through the years, of how our Lord has continued to enter the hearts of His faithful and in them, light the fire of His Love.

What are the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit?

Wisdom helps us recognize the importance of others and the importance of keeping God central in our lives.

Understanding is the ability to comprehend the meaning of God’s message.

Knowledge is the ability to think about and explore God’s revelation, and also to recognize there are mysteries of faith beyond us.

Counsel is the ability to see the best way to follow God’s plan when we have choices that relate to him.

Fortitude is the courage to do what one knows is right.

Piety helps us pray to God in true devotion.

Fear of the Lord is the feeling of amazement before God, who is all-present, and whose friendship we do not want to lose.

Breathe into me, Holy Spirit, that my thoughts may all be holy. Move in me, Holy Spirit, that my work, too, may be holy. Attract my heart, Holy Spirit, that I may love only what is holy. Strengthen me, Holy Spirit, that I may defend all that is holy. Protect me, Holy Spirit, that I may always be holy.

Saint Augustine

As I was praying last night, I was reminded of this post from 2011 and started to ponder all that was here and how our Lord does love us all.

Washing The Kitchen Floor With The Holy Spirit

My typical Saturday…with only one difference. I got my lazy but off the computer for a break to wash my kitchen floor and had a friendly chat with the Holy Spirit while doing so. It went something like this:

Holy Spirit: Hey Peg?

Me: Yes?

Holy Spirit: Remember back when you were so distraught and didn’t have anyone left to turn to regarding the state of your soul and the mortal sins you were covered in? Remember when your eyes were so swollen from crying, thinking that God would never forgive you and that He must be punishing you, and you thought God hated you?

Me: Yes. I’ll never forget that day. Or the days that followed.

Holy Spirit: Remember when you dropped everything you were doing, got in your car, drove to find any Catholic Church, and parked your car, walked in and sat in the pew, and broke down in tears again, begging God to forgive you?

Me: Yes. I don’t know how I got there or how I brought myself to do that.

Holy Spirit: Remember there was only one other person in that church, that just happened to be open? A church building where the doors were not locked? Remember then after sitting in tears, the Catholic Priest who just happened to be there, who just happened to tap you on the shoulder and ask you if he could help you?

Me: Yes. I was lucky that day!!

Holy Spirit: Luck? HAHA! Remember it being as if the Priest was pulling your teeth, for him to get you to confess your sins? Remember Him asking you if you would like to confess them and you did everything you could not to and told him that God would never forgive you but you confessed your sins anyway?

Me: Yes. For many years after, I struggled with thinking He was very angry with me. I walked out that day thinking, pfft, yeah. My life then was hell. I hated being there but didn’t know how to get out. I wasn’t sure if I could. In the state of hell that is. I didn’t want to leave the church.

Holy Spirit: Do you understand now, it was I who was with you, before you acted on my Love for you and you decided to go? Do you know now that it was I who carried you out of that hell you were living in and continue to keep you from there? Do you know now, that is God’s Grace? Do you know now, it was I who planted the seeds of repentance? I who made it possible for you to find the open church? I who made sure the Priest was there for you? I who was with you when you left and stayed with you? I who am STILL with you? I who Love you? I who made everything so EASILY possible for you to return to me? All you did was listen and followed your heart, where I can always be found. Do you know now how much God loves you? How much God loves ALL his children?

Me: I do now. Thank you Lord!

More like the Holy Spirit washing the floor with me…..

*Self Knowledge

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When The Bottom Falls Out


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I went to grab a bowl from my cabinet for dinner tonight and when I did, I found this…

Before finding this, and keep in mind it was one of my favorite bowls, I had received an email from my daughter’s teacher in regards to her struggling with behavior issues again, requesting a meeting. My youngest daughter is on the Autism Spectrum and problems arise when her routine changes.

Before receiving the email, I had been struggling with other family issues pertaining to my oldest daughter, and my middle daughter is struggling with both issues with her sisters on top of being a very emotional preteen. SO , things have been slightly tense trying to carry it all, not very easily,  and coming to realize that I can not fix anything, but I can hope in our Lord and pray.

My favorite bowl. When I pulled it down and noticed the bottom had fallen out, all I could think of was, “This too?”. I’m not a materialistic person. The loss of the bowl was a split second of loss, as I got back to the real issues with my girls, which also, I was not able to fix today. So I pray and place it all once again into our Lord hands.

I sat down and pondered for a moment of all that was taking place. Got back up an pulled that bottomless bowl from the trash and was reminded to cling to our Lord. Stop struggling.

When things in this world are tough, and everything seems to go so bad that the bottom falls out, cling to our Lord even tighter and don’t let go. When the bottom falls out, your left with the top.  And that is how a “halo” is made.

A beautiful quote from St. Faustina:

Sister Faustina wrote of her experiences at the behest of the Lord Jesus:
My daughter, I demand that you devote all your free moments to writing about My goodness and mercy. It is your office and your assignment throughout your life to continue to make known to souls the great mercy I have for them and to exhort them to trust in My bottomless mercy. (1586)

“O Blood and Water, which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus as a fount of Mercy for us, I trust in You.”

And this.. is the side of that favorite bowl. His word was not broken.

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Don’t Run Away – Be Not Afraid


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I find it beautiful that when our Lord makes known His presence, its after a time of reflecting that we are able to put it all together and say without a doubt, after He has already been in the moment we are experiencing, I know that was you Lord.  He makes it very clear by doing this, that we are not to cling to the moment, nor the people in it with us, but rather too Him  and understand that He truly is always with us, sometimes hidden, when we forget He is in the Tabernacle and in His time, we come to see Him in many different ways in our lives.

Imagine being the soldiers at the tomb during His glorious resurrection. Imagine the anxiety of the soldiers who at one point were simply doing their job and the very next were faced with something so profound, the only thing they could do besides face it, was to run in fear. Imagine the fear that would cause a hardened trained solder to abandon his post. Imagine knowing that you are a soldier appointed to guard a post and leaving that post meant absolute death for not following the orders of your superiors.

Through my entire awareness of my conversion of heart, I have been presented with so many forms of anxiety and it was only when I learned how to depend on our Lord for everything that that the anxiety’s I was facing became nothing more than temptations to run away from the cross our Lord was asking me to carry with Him. Many times through this, when the pressure was at its greatest and I just couldn’t take any more of the pain I was seeing in others, that they never even noticed in themselves, and in the pain it was causing me to see it, I would be tempted to toss it all aside and run away. Anywhere away from it all. When we do that, we find out very quickly that no matter where we run to, its already there too. The reason its already there is because its our Lord calling you to help Him. Calling you to cling to Him. Calling you to pick up that cross of daily life and walk through all the destruction and misery that is attacking you, to walk through with Him, the valley of the shadow of death and into Life. Life in Him and with Him.

There is nothing more peaceful that a soul can do than to call out to our Lord while in the midst of the turmoil with your entire heart, calling to Him: “Jesus I trust in You”. He always answers as He is already there. “Be not afraid”.  To the true believer, all the heavy fog of anxiety (fight or flight) and despair (run away) blows away and is replaced by His calm (fight for Him). If you are one with Him, handing Him all of it and not clinging to what you can’t let go of, you are able to see Him as the Storm that is raging all around and He pulls you into His Eye where there is silence, peace and joy. Like a hurricane, in the eye of the storm there is always calm. Its what is on the outside of the eye that is being blown about and scattered. Its not to say we don’t enter into the turbulence that surrounds, but we know we are anchored in Him and we have Him as our Life line back to the calm, in order to help those overcome by their own fears of destruction and anxiety’s of daily life.

Keep me as the apple of your eye;

hide me in the shadow of your wings – Psalm 17:8

How do we stay in the Eye of God? Love. We don’t run away. We don’t leave our post. We face all things with faith in Him. We walk through our lives as He on the via dolorosa with Him until we come to the end, in which He says “It is finished”.

Up until yesterday my husband and I had been experiencing a rough patch in our relationship. I had been struggling a lot lately with not being able to see our Lord in those within my own home and particularly in my husband. Much like the woman who went to the tomb, I know our Lord is here someplace, I just couldn’t find Him. As I wrote yesterday, I spoke about how my morning offering was very different. Something beautifully different. Before my husband left for work, he hugged me and smiled. For the first time in many years, it was genuine. It was a genuine hug in love and not just because that was what a husband did. Its been very difficult but our Lord has given my husband so much grace and I can see Him working through him.  I can see our Lord working in him, trying to wake him up, but I had not seen my husband turn to Him and say yes Lord. That smile on his face was one I had not seen for some time and when he left, all I wanted to do was to see that smile when he came back. We must always remember that even though we can’t see, through faith, we trust Him, no matter how painful it may be.

This morning as I write this, after the events of yesterday, after of the events I have faced to date, after it has all unfolded and the very moment is now memory, the entire Resurrection of our Lord at that moment outside of His tomb, is in my heart in that hug and smile, and now I can see and shout with all certainty in JOY, “‘Rabbuni!’” I know with my entire heart, that was you. I picked up this cross, and all of them in this life that I give completely to You, with You and carry them all in love with You. Sacred Heart of Jesus, I trust in You.

Praise, glory and honor to You O Lord, for all time and eternity. Amen

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