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Independence Day From Sinfulness

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Saturday July 4th, I will be dedicating to our Holy Mother Mary and first Saturday. I ask you to join me as we celebrate her, our Catholic Faith and TRUE Independence from our sinfulness. I have my flag out already. I will be bringing my children to Holy Mass after we all receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Just an idea I feel needs to be shared.

“In the end, My Immaculate Heart will triumph.” – Our Lady of Fatima

FREEDOM!

All praise, honor and glory to our Lord, Jesus Christ.

EDIT to add:

Its not a call to abandon hope, nor to hide inside this day, but to celebrate LIFE in Christ. To still enjoy our Lords creation. TO STILL live the life our Lord has given to us and to appreciate Holiness in the Light. Its not that we are NOT still sinners, but rather we know we are and we are TRYING with the grace of God to get back home to our Lord, in TRUE Love. Agape!

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“Praise God, from Whom all blessings flow;
Praise Him, all creatures here below;
Praise Him above, ye heavenly host;
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost!
Amen!”

EDIT:

The original photo has been changed at the top of this post. WITHOUT KNOWING, I was flying my Vatican Flag upside down for many many WEEKS. I didn’t know it. Today, I fixed it. Keep in mind ANY flag flown upside down is a sign of “distress” and NOT disrespect. Pray for this nation and the ENTIRE Church.

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Eucharist

adoration

Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh…Our Lord came as the new Adam. In my sinfulness, I am fallen Eve and must become Woman so to become one with Him. If I become Him, and share in the pains of the hatred the world had for Him so be it, as He had already become me, on His cross. I must become one with Him in the Eucharist as our Lord truly is there. I must repent. I must confess and I must believe. I must love my Love with all my heart, strength soul and mind. I must love my neighbor as my Lord has loved. I must die to self and live in Christ in order to be in Love. I accept.

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St Thomas Aquinas

temptation-of-st-thomas-aquinas

All that I have written seems like straw compared to what has now been revealed to me. – Saint Thomas Aquinas

Saint Thomas Aquinas never finished his writings. I can relate. If all he has written O Lord is straw, then what I have done is mud. May they mingle and become bricks for You’re great glory O Lord.

For everything we can ever know about God, regarding all the inner workings of His way, the simplest and easiest is through Love. Love is simplicity. If we complicate all that is true with what we feel we need to know then we are taking away room for love. To simply love, is to understand the Divinity.

Does a wife love her Spouse any more upon learning what His business is or how He runs His business? Or does a loving wife just continue to love her Spouse? Our Lord shares everything with His wife. All she has to do is ask. But it should never come between or hinder in any way, the love she has for Him. She knows He is in control and all He does is for the good of all.

To read more about this wonderful Saint, see here

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Be Still

“Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”

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“Follow Me”

“Follow Me”

“Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.” Matthew 16:24

Its an order, not a suggestion for salvation. Pick up your cross and follow Him. He is the road map to salvation. He is the road. He is the way and the truth and the light. He is Jesus Christ. He is the only way to the Father. He is life.

In order to defeat evil, Christ shows us the way. The battle of good VS evil is a “Civil War” of good & evil in each individual soul that needs to be won for the common good of all humanity and can be because of the Resurrection of Jesus Christ. It is a “Civil War” in each soul that makes itself known in our actions towards one another. If you love sin and the evil inside how can you love one another as He so loves us? The battle is raging inside and is need of attention because its spilling onto the streets of society.

The war is not with your “neighbor” but yourself.

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No Soul Left Behind

Since I could not attend adoration yesterday morning, I found myself in the prayer labyrinth. Before I started my prayer walk, I went over to the grotto where our statue of Bernette is with Our Lady of Lourdes. I prayed to her and told her I had fallen madly in love with her Son. We ended up having a very long conversation. I smiled and walked to where the start of the labyrinth was and on my way, I found blessed palms laying on the ground. They were intertwined with one another and someone spent time to do so. I picked them up as I could never leave them just laying on the ground. They were with me my entire journey. As I got to the center of the labyrinth, I knelt down and began to pray. As I did, I noticed another blessed palm, tucked into one of the lamps, out of normal sight. I left it there and finished my prayers.

While attending the Mass of the Lords Supper, I remembered the blessed palm that needed help. I was filled with an overwhelming desire to not leave that palm behind in the elements. It had been blessed and did not belong anywhere but in a place of honor.

After mass & a brief adoration, I walked outside and it was quite dark. There were many people around as mass had just concluded. Some watched as I walked to the center of the labyrinth which was unlit. I knelt down and felt around under the lamp in which I had seen the palm. I could not see but managed to take hold of it and was so happy I had found it. I couldn’t help but look up to the sky and smile as I said, “Like a thief in the night”. No one knew what I was doing and how important it was for me not to leave that palm behind. Like the Chrism used at baptism, that leaves the mark of the LORD on each soul indefinitely, identifying us as His, was the way I seen this palm. It had become lost and belonged to our Lord. That drive I had in me to get it, is the same drive our Lord has to go get His souls when they become lost. Or, “No soul left behind”.

Mark 13:2 “And Jesus answering said unto him, Seest thou these great buildings? there shall not be left one stone upon another, that shall not be thrown down.”

“turn your ear to me, make haste. Be for me a rock-fastness, a fortified citadel to save me.”

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Palm Sunday: Hosanna!


Oh to only be a palm fron that day Our Lord entered Jerusalem, placed at His feet, comforting His entry..

“When they drew near Jerusalem and came to Bethphage on the Mount of Olives, Jesus sent two disciples, saying to them, “Go into the village opposite you, and immediately you will find an ass tethered, and a colt with her. 3 Untie them and bring them here to me. And if anyone should say anything to you, reply, ‘The master has need of them.’ Then he will send them at once.”

This happened so that what had been spoken through the prophet might be fulfilled:
“Say to daughter Zion, ‘Behold, your king comes to you, meek and riding on an ass, and on a colt, the foal of a beast of burden.'” The disciples went and did as Jesus had ordered them. They brought the ass and the colt and laid their cloaks over them, and he sat upon them. The very large crowd spread their cloaks on the road, while others cut branches from the trees and strewed them on the road.

The crowds preceding him and those following kept crying out and saying: “Hosanna to the Son of David; blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord; hosanna in the highest.” And when he entered Jerusalem the whole city was shaken 8 and asked, “Who is this?”

And the crowds replied, “This is Jesus the prophet, from Nazareth in Galilee.” Matt 21 1-11

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The Pain Of Abortion

The pain a soul feels after having an abortion is endless. No amount of suffering a woman can feel by HAVING a child under any circumstance, can ever compare to the pain she has after taking the life of her own child. Evey relationship with every person she comes in contact with after making the decision to have one, is compromised. The emotional and psychological problems are enormous and burdensome and to add it to the cross she already carry’s is a tremendous amount of weight, most times then not, just to heavy to carry alone. Everything in the woman’s life in this world after having an abortion, reminds her of the day she took her own child’s life. The pain NEVER goes away. How do I know? I fell for the empty rhetoric at one time in my life, that the baby growing inside of me, was not human.

In March of 1993, while having an affair with a married man fifteen years older then myself, for already two years, I found out I was pregnant. I was already a single mom with a six year old daughter from a marriage that should have never taken place, struggling to make ends meet. No one knew I was having this affair and I was all alone. What I thought was “Love” I had felt for this man, was anything but love as I can see so clearly now. I sat him down and told him I was pregnant. His response was he wasn’t about to leave his wife. They had been married for over twenty years and he couldn’t do that to her. Rather then go with my motherly INSTINCT to protect this beautiful life of the child growing inside of me, I told him that I would see my doctor and discuss abortion.

The day I met with my doctor, the same doctor that had delivered me, he confirmed I was pregnant and only about four to five weeks along. I told him the situation and that I was considering abortion. He said ok and left me sitting on the examination table as he walked out of the room. As I sat there on the examination table, I heard that voice in my heart. DON’T DO THIS! This is not you! And I changed my mind. I couldn’t go through with this horrific thing I was thinking about doing. It was done! I was going to have this child and all the pain and suffering I would have to endure bringing another child into this world even without the funds to do so. It was time to face the music of the life I was leading.

The nurse came into the examination room and told me to roll up my sleeve. I did and she jabbed me with a needle. I asked her what she had just given me and she said it was “Vitamins”. I then told her after, I changed my mind and I was going to be going through with the pregnancy. Her very stern and angry face melted into one of horror. I quickly learned, it was not vitamins she gave me, but a shot to kill the baby and cause a miscarriage. I NEVER knew having an abortion was just one shot away. I always thought it was a serious medical procedure that would take time to think about because it would have to be planned out ahead of time. It wasn’t. It was all contained in that shot the nurse had already given me, after I had changed my mind. My stupidity, led to the murder of my child, at my hands. My lack of understanding the SERIOUSNESS of the situation all came to light.

She left the room and my doctor came back in. He held my hands and said it was to late and that it was in God’s hands now. I ended up losing the baby two days later. Alone, at home, without anyone knowing the pain I was going through. Nor the pain this little innocent life felt. It was official. I committed murder.

Not a day has passed that I don’t think about my “little soul” in heaven. I am constantly reminded about this little one every time I see children, pregnant women, birthday party’s and even still now, in my own children. During the time of this event in my life, I tried to block it out as much as I could. In doing so, the relationship I had with my daughter faltered because I could not bare to look at her and NOT see the child who I took out of this world. The psychological and emotional effects took their toll. How could anyone want me now, knowing what I had done? How could I explain to my daughter that she could have had a baby brother or sister but I murdered the baby. The effects of abortion on the soul of the woman who has had one, is a pain she will carry with her through her entire life. The baby just doesn’t “Go Away” and the woman is NOT left to continue on in her life. The baby goes away and the woman carry’s that event forever. Nothing can change the facts.

As many years that have passed, I always think about how old my child would be now. What they would have looked like. Who’s life they would have influenced. My child would be entering college this year. Just this past Christmas, my five year old daughter gave me a present that shook my soul. It was an innocent gift she had made in school for me. Her teacher had drawn her arms and hands and glued them onto a heart. The little hands were my five year-olds hands, imprinted in red tempera paint. When I opened the gift, I burst into tears and hugged her so tight. I couldn’t stop crying. Seeing the little red hands reminded me of the little one I have in heaven and what I had done. You see, the pain never does go away.

In my conversion of heart, coming back to the Catholic Church, just confessing this grave sin eased the burden I carry. It is a forgivable act and through repentance and working WITH the graces our Lord STILL pours on the soul, it becomes lighter to carry when you know Our Lord STILL loves us. I didn’t have the counseling made available now to help women who have had abortions. At the time, the evil one had me believing I was damned to hell because of this act. I only know now, that is NOT true! Rachel’s Vineyard is one such organization that WILL HELP you! You do not have to suffer alone.

Never NEVER let anyone tell you that baby inside of you is just a blob of tissue. What they don’t tell you is how the loss of that “Blob” at your own hands, causes a woman so much pain and so much emotional damage, not to mention the damage done to the body. If my child was just as they say, I wouldn’t have this weight on my soul. Obviously its more then just a blob. The consequences of taking that “Blob” last a lifetime. Get INFORMED! And then inform everyone. Abortion is just a sanitized name for murder.

No matter when the pregnancy ends, conception is the beginning of motherhood.

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My Heart Bleeds For You

How many times in my life, I have heard these words, “My Heart Bleeds For You” from very sarcastic hearts along the way… It always seams as if this world is not lacking insincerity when your down and out. Seems someone was always there to rub there fingers together and tell you, “Hear that? Its the smallest violin playing my heart bleeds for you..”

Today, I heard those words again, along with the violin. They did not come from insincerity, but in front of The Blessed Sacrament. I let the world get to me today and rather then sit and let it get me more then it has, I went to visit our Lord in Adoration. Today is First Friday and the significance is astounding: The First Friday Devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus.:

“The First Friday of each month was designated by our Savior Himself as a day to be
consecrated to honoring His Sacred Heart…. As the object of this devotion is to make our Savior Jesus Christ ardently and perfectly loved, and to make reparation for the outrages offered to Him in the past, as well as for those which he daily receives in the Blessed Eucharist…Jesus Christ merits our love at all times, but alas! He is despised and outraged in the Sacrament of His love at all times, and so people should at all times make reparation to Him.
We should then adore Jesus Christ in this august Sacrament, make a fervent act of love to Jesus in the tabernacle, thank Him for having instituted this Mystery of love, express our sorrow at seeing Him so abandoned, and resolve to visit Him as soon as possible and love Him unceasingly.
Attendance at the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass is assuredly the best means of honoring and loving the adorable Heart of Jesus. ”

So the world started getting to me today, and I was moved to tears. I drove over to adoration to spend time with Our Lord and the Adoration of Our Lord was being held in the Day Chapel and not in the Adoration Chapel, because today is First Friday.

There were a few people there, so I walked around some chairs and knelt down to pray. As I began to tell our Lord about my “Bad Day” and how it was truly getting to me, how I needed strength, from the main Church came the sound of a violin. I Thought of my mom, because she used to play and then thought about how I myself had used the words in a selfish way to people, “My Heart Bleeds For you”. I was so caught up in my self pity, it didn’t hit me until the ride home, that today is First Friday. Our Lord had strengthened me by using some not so innocent slang, to tell me, He in fact was with me and telling me so. The reason the world was getting to me today, is a matter of faith. I thank My Lord! I could not LOVE Him more!

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St. Cyril of Jerusalem

“Make your fold with the sheep; flee from the wolves: depart not from the Church,”

St. Cyril of Jerusalem, pray for us. Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on us all. Amen

St. Cyril’s teaching about the Blessed Sacrament is of the first importance, for he was speaking freely, untrammelled by the “discipline of the secret”. On the Real Presence he is unambiguous: “Since He Himself has declared and said of the bread: This is My Body, who shall dare to doubt any more? And when He asserts and says: This is My Blood, who shall ever hesitate and say it is not His Blood?” Of the Transformation, he argues, if Christ could change water into wine, can He not change wine into His own Blood? The bread and wine are symbols: “In the type of bread is given thee the Body, in the type of wine the Blood is given thee”; but they do not remain in their original condition, they have been changed, though the senses cannot tell us this: “Do not think it mere bread and wine, for it is the Body and Blood of Christ, according to the Lord’s declaration”. “Having learned this and being assured of it, that appears to be bread is not bread, though perceived by the taste, but the Body of Christ, and what appears to be wine is not wine, though the taste says so, but the Blood of Christ . . . strengthen thy heart, partaking of it as spiritual (food), and rejoice the face of thy soul”. It is difficult not to see the whole doctrine of Transubstantiation in these explicit words. Confirmation is with blessed chrism: “As the bread of the Eucharist after the invocation of the Holy Ghost is not bread, but the Body of Christ, so this holy myrrh is no longer simple, as one might say, after the invocation, but a gift of Christ and capable by the presence of the Holy Ghost of giving His divinity” (ii, 4).

Taken from New Advent

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Elijah

The Prophet Elijah Receiving Bread and Water from an Angel
1628 by Peter Paul Rubens
I can not stop, pondering Elijah… Ever since bible class last night. The passage is: Malachi 3. The more I ponder, the more amazed I become.. Good Lord help me to put it into words, if it be your will. Until then, this picture by Peter Paul Rubens (NOT to be confused with Pee Wee Herman) will have to grab your attention as the words I am trying to put on this blog have a LOT to do with it 🙂

“See, I will send the prophet Elijah to you before that great and dreadful day of the LORD comes. He will turn the hearts of the parents to their children, and the hearts of the children to their parents; or else I will come and strike the land with total destruction.”

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Dad? Um Abba Father!

Ah the “Freudian Slip”. An action of the tongue so often called “faulty actions”, “faulty functions” or “misperformances” after himself, rather then something in the inner soul that I surely believe God in His infinite wisdom, brings about to the person preoccupied with other thoughts, they are afraid to express with the tongue. Or, Gods way of getting it “off the souls chest” an into the light of day to reflect on or to repent for thinking it in the first place.

“For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” Romans 8:15

As I woke up yesterday morning, I noticed my husband had a perplexing look on his face. I know he was worried about our income. I didn’t say anything and walked away taking his anxiety with me to our back yard. While stepping outside, with the weight of his worry’s, I knew a prayer was needed for us. I looked up in desperation to the sky with all the intentions to pray to God and out of my mouth, instead of God, comes Dad. I immediately started to giggle out loud. The weight of the world was gone. I then prayed in thanksgiving to God.

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34

This was the second time this had happened to me which I thought of immediately after praying yesterday. The first time, was in the presence of a homeless man that I engaged in conversation, by asking him if I could pray with him and for him and give him some money for lunch.. I ended up speaking to this man named Fred, for almost two hours, about Jesus and faith. I could not believe how strong his faith was and he had taught me a lot about my own faith. In the midst of our conversation, when I was telling him about how LOVE was the driving force, I was about to say “Our God” and what came out of my mouth was “My Dad”. We both stopped dead in conversation and both our jaws dropped.There was a few seconds of silence which was quickly replaced with Fred saying to me, that is Abba Father! We both smiled. It was hard for me to leave Fred that day, and I will never forget him.

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