Tag Archives: Virgin Mother Mary

Thanks Mom 2017


My husband & I had been working all day on our gardening. Its been about four years since I have been able to do any weeding or serious physical working, as my back and neck issues had been declining. Today and yesterday, our Lord allowed me the grace to get out and do some serious physical work. It was wonderful!

We had lost everything in the drought. There wasn’t much left growing in front of our home. Even our palm trees died. You can imagine the mess. So, we decided to just level everything and start over, planting nothing but succulents with a wonderful rock garden, a sand base and maybe a dry river bed. Something easy for us to take care of and didn’t need a lot of water nor upkeep.

We cut back a wall of dead ice plant that had overgrown the retaining wall which leads up to the back yard. Clearing out almost everything that should have been done a long time ago. As we ended tonight, and entered our home and we had a beautiful sense of accomplishment. We were able to get something done together that had been bothering both of us, for a long time. Working together to get it done. Mind you, it was only the cleaning out of four years of overgrown deep weeds and dead trees and plants. We haven’t started the new decorating yet, but we did it together to build something new.

I walked out on the balcony to take some pictures and I posted them to my social media page. As I looked at the pictures, I seen something I hadn’t before. That retaining wall. The one that was unseen for many years, covered in overgrown dead ice plant. I realized quickly where my Mama Mary Garden would now be. The retaining wall looked just like a snake with its head cut off.  It will soon have a statue of our Holy Mother,  above the water fall in the corner of it. Mothers Day is just around the corner.


May is the month of Mary. May she be crowned Queen of Heaven and Earth, in all hearts.

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Third Week Of Advent


Tonight brings with it, the Third Week of Advent. Our journey to the Newborn King is almost complete.. There is a Light in the darkness. A hint of Sunrise just after the darkness is about to pass..

In this week, I have been blessed to see our Lord in His infancy. Pure innocence through the gift of my daughter, by simply asking me an innocent question. A question born from her gift of “innocence” from our Lord, asking about His.

I spent a good portion of my time able to see just how beautiful His gift is to us in the relationship He had with Mama Mary. That first look of His and hers after the moment of birth, was the exact look between the both of them at the moment of His death on the cross. His “innocence” of infancy, being the Son of God, was exactly the same on the Cross, in His sacrifice, as His “innocence” at birth.

I sat in contemplation in front of our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament in Exposition last night. As I examined MY conscience, and pondered how guilty I was, I could see the Infant Christ in front of me, cooing and looking at me, without a care in the world for my sins, looking for me to simply love Him. To pick Him up and hold Him in my heart. To carry Him. And Mama Mary was right there to hand Him to me. For a repentant sinner, the greatest gift there is, is to hear and comprehend, that the Innocent Infant truly loves me and wants me to love Him.

While praying the sorrowful mystery’s of the Holy Rosary, I couldn’t see our Lord as a 33-year-old Man. I could only see Him as the Innocent Infant in the manger for each and every mystery. The Babe, unable to speak at times. At other times when able to speak, no one could comprehend what He was saying and punished Him for their inadequacies. It brought me great consolation in regards to how Abba Father seen His Son and the magnitude of His sacrifice. It also brought me in for a closer look as to how Abba Father sees ALL His “children”. It’s no wonder that a single drop of His blood covers a magnitude of sins.

Truly, a wonderful gift this is. The gift of Gods Son, giving me life, and giving me a life to ask an innocent question, about the Life of the One, where all life is created.

May you be filled with wonder and awe and may reading everything here be a gift, to give glory to God and fill you with joy.

The journey continues to Peace!

The Madonna and sleeping Child with the Infant St John the Baptist


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The Heavy Rose

heavy rose 2

“My beloved is white and ruddy, the chiefest among ten thousand”

While in Adoration of our Lord yesterday, I prayed.

Lord, more than often, I ponder my weakness and understand I am to weak to lift anyone up to you. I ask You O Lord, through the Immaculate Heart of Mary, with my entire heart, to bring Your Hand down to those who seek you in their needs, and scoop them up with Your strength, with Your Almighty Hand and please hear them, heal them and answer them. Amen

As I walked out to my garden this morning, I noticed a rose hanging down on one of my favorite rose bushes. I couldn’t figure out why it was hanging so low, almost upside down. I grabbed my cutters and while I snipped it off the bush, I seen why. It is VERY heavy. I noticed at the base of the rose there were two flowers that had developed and became one flower. One receptacle with two blooms that became one. The bloom is so fragrant and heavy, I could only remember the prayer from yesterday. You can click on the photo below to enlarge it to see what I am talking about.

Heavy Rose 1

Ephesians 6 : 10-18 –
“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we are not contending against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world rulers of this present darkness, against the spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day and having done all to stand. Stand therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the equipment of the gospel of peace; besides all these, taking the shield of faith, with which you can quench all the flaming darts of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the word of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Pray at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication.”

“Thou art fairer than the children of men”, “the chiefest among ten thousand,” Psalms 45:2, Song of Solomon 5:10

“Thy name is as ointment poured forth,” Song of Solomon 1:3

“Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever,” Hebrews 13:8

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Prayer For 2013


Lord help me to focus and work on all that is needed for You in 2013. Help me to live as You have intended me to live. Help me to be as You have created me to be. Help me Lord to be there in times of need for those You have placed in the life you have created for me. May I lead all souls back to You O Lord in my words, actions and way of living. May I always seek You first in all things, especially in my sufferings and trials. May I find joy in You and through You my Beloved Lord, and share this joy with the entire world, so that in its times of sadness and bitterness, it may hold on to your sweet compassion with both hands, and eat only what You give to them. May I continue to win the battles over evil in my soul and in my life, with You and all your Saints and Holy Angels at the ready. May all the holy souls in Purgatory be released from their bondage and accept you’re pardon and mercy my Lord. May the children you have given to me, pull ever closer to You this year and stay at Your side. May we all grow in all the gifts of the most Holy Spirit. May the murder of all you’re children through the heinous act of abortion come to an end. May Your One Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church and all her members come to know You better and serve only You. May those who have left, return to You. If my death in exile should come this year, I unite it to Your death and give You my Love, all the glory and honor. I hope to spend eternity with You. May I become so lost in You, that all I find, is You, all I see, taste and touch and know, is You. May you have mercy on us all. I ask this through the Immaculate Heart of Mary our Mother, to Your most Sacred Heart O Lord. Amen

Have a blessed and Christ centered New Year.

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Yes Every Second

The other day I wrote about how Mama Mary’s “Yes” joined her will with the will of God. Here

I want to expand on that as I have been pondering it since writing it. For good to take over a soul, For God to be present and the Light to shine bright, it must be nurtured at all cost in order to battle the external evil throughout the world. Be it personal evils, (sins) that tempt us or external evils being that of which the world is falling into to. The excuse of the way society “just is” rather then the way society should be. “But everyone is doing it” should never be used as an excuse to sin or to not try to change it with good. Least society gets to the point of no return and living to do good, becomes more difficult to accomplish. Look at Sodom and Gomorrah.

Mama Mary, living in retrospect to her “yes” to God, grew in supernatural faith, through her humility at every second of her life. The second a woman finds out she is expecting, her entire life changes. She realizes she is no longer alone. Inside of her is another soul. She then does what she was designed to do, nurture it at all cost. Its impossible for a woman to forget she is pregnant. At conception, everything changes in a split second.The woman goes from being a woman, to being a mother. For a man, I can easily say, what a man takes his final vow to become a Catholic Priest, he is no longer just a man, able to do the things he once did before that vow, but rather now must adhere to the vow he took with God. In a split second, he is transformed from man, into so much more. At the very second of her yes, she was no longer Mary. I should say no longer the “Mary” everyone knew, but now in fact, became the Mother of God.

“But Mary said to the angel, “How can this be, since I have no relations with a man?” Luke 1:34

Its very difficult to forget your a mother and even more difficult to forget you have never had relations with a man to bring this child into the world. Every second after the moment of her “Yes”, became even more “Yes” to God. Yes to God, at the Presentation in the Temple, “The child’s father and mother were amazed at what was said about him; and Simeon blessed them and said to Mary his mother, “Behold, this child is destined for the fall and rise of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be contradicted (and you yourself a sword will pierce)* so that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed.” She knew as it had only been a few months earlier that the Angle had presented her with the news but God did not give her the words to express this, (He gave her the Word) I have to say for now, for the safety of the Holy Family, at that time. The event of dialogue was Mary’s “Spiritual Consolation” made manifest in the world in response to her yes to God. She grew in humility by saying yes again to God, by remaining silent and accepting all that came her way.

The finding of Jesus in the Temple and at His response to her: Why did you search for me? Did you not know that I must be about my Father’s business?”

Mary in no way could understand our Lords relationship with God the Father. Although being told, she could only understand her love and relationship with God. Just as today, in each and every soul on earth, no one can understand each souls personal love for God, but God. The personal relationship with God the Father known only to Him. Raising the Child, in the Holy Family, with Joseph as step father to our Lord was all she could do to bring a sense of “Normalcy” into the family for external eyes. She was being a Mother and protecting the Child from external forces that might have condemned Him for what His circumstances in life “Looked Like” to external eyes. Our Lord at this moment was allowing Mama Mary to understand His deeper connection to God the Father. Thus at this statement from Him, she was brought back to the first “Yes” and once again said “Yes” to God, by keeping this in her heart and growing in humility. Accepting once again the Will of God. She kept these things in her heart, knowing full well, God in His time, would reveal everything. Not her.

At every second of Mama Mary’s life, the first “Yes” to God, became living “Yes” with God at every second of her life. Including the Crucifixion of her Son. She did not hate. She did not back down from loving God, she simply accepted all that came with the simple first “yes” and followed everything up from that moment on with Yes God. Growing in deep humility for all that came her way, knowing it was the will of God she had said yes to at the first yes.

When we say yes to God, we are saying yes to everything. Not just what we like or what sounds good. We are accepting the struggles, the suffering and the trials with the understanding that God will never abandon us, but is using us for the benefit of others.

When you think your being tested, when the word has you down, never stop saying “Yes Lord”. Simply by saying Yes Lord, your saying no to the evil trying to turn you against Him.

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Motherly Love

This afternoon, I had the pleasure of eating lunch in St. Threse Plaza, next to my church. My daughter Violet was able to attend Vacation Bible Study and after lunches were passed out to all children and younger siblings. She asked me if we could have a picnik. My younger daughter Chloe had been feeling much better and I said yes. We said our prayers and began to eat.

Children of all ages were playing around us and one little boy who looked just over a year old was playing with the older children. He was staggering a bit as he walked and I coudl tell, he had not been on his feet for very long. He was adorable! With that, an older child who had been running from another child, plowed directly into him, knocking him to the ground where his tiny little head bounced on the cement. Without even batting an eye, I ran to him. I picked up this little one and was overcome with so much love. I didn’t feel any anamosity to the children who knocked him down. I did not even see them. All I could see is this little child in pain and needed to help him. I held him in my arms and asked where his mommy was. She came over as I comforted him and I handed him back to her. Leaving him to her, knowing what love truly is. I felt myself completely detached from everything, including my own children sitting, watching the event take place, with the exception of ensureing this child be comforted.

In the time it took to see this playing out, and act on it, I was brought to The Road to Calvary at the exact moment of Mama Mary meeting our Lord for the first time. Running to Him with open arms. Wanting to holding the child Jesus in her arms, trying to comfort Him in agoney and then releasing Him again to complete what He was born to do. Seeing completely the love Mary had for her Son, our Lord. To share Him with all, knowing He did not belong to her alone. She could not keep him to herself. Moreso, not placing the balme on anyone, but understanding fully, it was what He needed to do, to ensure all humankind, could be picked up by Him and comforted in His love for all time.

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Holy Mary: The Chaste Spouse Of The Holy Spirit

So many times, I ponder my life and the things I have witnessed in regards to my Catholic Faith. When I look at the beauty of God’s creation and the blessings I have received in the form of my children, I can’t help but thank our Lord Jesus Christ for them and our Holy Mother Mary for her dedication to God. For her response to Him in just one word, YES, meaning the salvation for not only myself, but for my children and all God’s children.

The other day, as I was sitting pondering how difficult my life has truly been, because of the choices I have made, my little four year old Chloe came walking around the corner. When my eyes seen her in all her innocence, I could not help but place myself in our Holy Mothers shoes and look on my child with only the love I have in my heart. I came very close to breaking down and sobbing openly at the thought of my child, persecuted by this world in the same way our Lord, our Virgin Mothers Son was and was reduced to pure repentance for anything and everything I have ever said and done against our Holy Mother and my Lord Jesus Christ. The things I have done and the difficulty’s I have faced mean nothing when I look into her eyes and her life. To be given such a gift from God came with such a heavy cross in which she started to carry even before the birth of our Savior.

I thought of how our Holy Mother Mary used to hold our Lord, fix His meals, make sure he had clean clothing to wear and love Him as a mother could love her Child. All the Motherly attributes and all through her humility, ensuring her Child, a place in this world just to be set apart to die for my sins and the sins of the world. How the burden she carried must have been so great to know in her heart, the fate of her only Son. “But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.” Luke 2:19

So many times I look at my own children and pray so many ways and times, they could understand the love I have for them, is nothing compared to the love God has for them. I pray they come to understand this world is just temporary and eternity with Christ is the final goal in which my hope for them rests.

“Jesus turned and said to them, “Daughters of Jerusalem, do not weep for me; weep for yourselves and for your children.” Luke 23:28

I pray for my children. My children, my hope to grow under the wing of the Holy Spirit as they do not truly belong to me, but belong to God as He is the keeper of all souls. I pray for all children in this world that they come to understand this and place their love for self, behind and place their love for God, above all things so everything then in their lives come to fall into place behind the lead of our Lord Jesus Christ.

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The Holy Rosary

“Some people are so foolish that they think they can go through life without the help of the Blessed Mother. Love the Madonna and pray the rosary, for her Rosary is the weapon against the evils of the world today. All graces given by God pass through the Blessed Mother.”

-St. Padre Pio

The Rosary – So many ways to let my pondering go in beautiful directions that never cease…So many things to focus on…

After my mother passed away in 2002, I moved here to San Diego. When her estate (LOL at Estate- We were very lucky to have a roof over our heads and it was no estate) was settled, I received a package of some belongings that I had “Won” of hers in the family lottery for personal items. Funny really, I received not only her rosary that I got in a lot of trouble for playing with as a child, but also my grandmothers. Keep in mind, I have 7 other brother and sisters, whom they could have easily gone to.
I also received a medallion. Leather on one side with the photo to the right, on the other side, sewn together with ribbon. I often looked at it intently as a child. I knew it was our Holy Mother and Infant Savior, but I could never figure out who the second child was, until recently. But, that is a story for another time. If your wondering, it is Saint John The Baptist.

Unfortunately, for a long time, praying the rosary for me, is a difficult task. Not because I don’t like it. I believe it is filled with so much beauty, wonder and spiritual bliss, but rather I find my concentration on our Lord and our Holy Mother difficult to keep during the prayer. I struggle constantly, with placing MY everyday life, with theirs, and seeing things from their perspective, in my life. I don’t try to do it, it just happens that way. I feel a deeper need to toss aside MY life events, and focus intently on what our Holy Family, must have endured. What I have learned to do, is have my bible in hand, reading the corresponding scripture, as I am praying. It tends to hold my attention better, then without.

I never prayed the rosary as a child. Actually, I believe I was taught how to pay it in Catholic grade school, but never prayed it at home or on my own. It wasn’t until last year that I started praying the rosary. With of course, my mother & grandmothers rosary’s. I have to say, it took me a while to learn it. LOL I also thought in the beginning if I didn’t pray it correctly, mixing up the Mysteries, or forgetting a Glory Be, it wouldn’t count. HA! What nonsense! Even in the times I was learning, so much in regards to our Lords passion became apparent to me. So much beauty of the LOVE and bond our Holy Mother had for her infant son and through His Life, Death and Resurrection. In between my failings to concentrate, I have shed many tears. For a long time, wailing out loud, tears streaming down my face was common, on Friday nights, during the Sorrowful Mysteries.

Every time I pray it, its as if a tiny glimpse of our Lords life, is revealed. Just a split second flash, that makes me feel as if I am there. There for the birth of our Lord. There in the garden before His death. There as the post He was tide to for scourging. There as the Roman guards are twisting the thorns together making the crown. I can see the robe they placed on Him and feel the pain in His back and chest as they place it on, sticking to the blood all over his body. Knowing any contact from even a breeze would be painful. I can see as the Romans ripped it off His body and thus pulling off more flesh, where His blood became coagulated and began to heal into the threads of the material. I can see Him covered in a mixture of dirt, blood and sand from falling, moving me to tears as Veronica wipes His face. Wishing I could do the same, just to bring Him that simple coolness, simple mercy from the cloth, while he burned in pain.

I could get carried away in this post. In the first week I started praying the Rosary, there was another glimpse of “Something” I visioned. Two faces of smoke. They were not happy faces. They were in agony. They were just gray, smoke, round faces. I could see them, like a smoke ring from a cigarette, close up at first but vanishing quickly into the darkness of the vision, holding their form but being overtaken in the dark. As if they were falling quickly, out of site and disappeared into it. They didn’t lose form or dissipate, they just went away. I never seen that again, in any vision since.

The best place to start to pray, I have found, is EWTN. Not only do they have the website to teach you, but also recite it ON TV throughout the day. Here is the link on HOW TO PRAY THE ROSARY. Learn it, pray it, ponder it 🙂

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