Tag Archives: Vocation

Until Death Do Us Part

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The Vocation of Marriage

What is a Vocation?

Catholic Dictionary

Term

VOCATION

Definition

A call from God to a distinctive state of life, in which the person can reach holiness. The Second Vatican Council made it plain that there is a “Universal call [vocatio] to holiness in the Church” (Lumen Gentium, 39). (Etym. Latin vocatio, a calling, summoning; from vocare, to call.)

As a woman, married to my husband, and also one who has accepted our Lords call for me to the Third Order of Carmel, I can strongly attest to the importance of “Ongoing Formation” with my brothers and sister in Carmel. We meet once a month, now, after a few years of discernment on my part, and my orders, as to, is this the correct path for me? Am I doing this because of a call from our Lord or am I doing this for selfish ideal, or for some other purpose that our Lord has not designed? There is a lot of time spent, in prayer and pondering a big decision as this.

As a married woman, when I look through my entire life, now, I can attest to the strong need for formation, BEFORE the Sacrament of Marriage, starting at a young age, before one jumps into the Vocation blind. As a soul who has had my fair share of interaction of others, who did not understand the Sacred Bond of the Vocation of Marriage, I ate up all the false ideas of this vocation, including the one that the world tries to feed us, that if it doesn’t work, just leave. No. When we come to understand, that decision to leave, is nothing but toxic poison that kills family due our own underdeveloped conscious, and we end up making life worse for not only us, but for all the souls effected by the sudden departure of a new family destroyed by divorce.

When I was very young, I held the strong belief that if one were to have relations with someone, they were in fact married and nothing could take that bond back, that the two shared together. It was a bond no one else had a right to share with either of the two. The most toxic thing someone told me, not long after I presented that belief I held at a very young age, was, that was the dumbest thing I could ever think or believe. Today, at the age of 50, I forgive that person and know I was right. Hindsight is 20/20. Very clearly I can see that if I had souls in my life at that time, who backed up what we believe in our faith, my life may have been a lot less painful. Only our Lord knows. But I also see how merciful He is, to lead me back to Him and that train of thought which keeps me on His track. Able to teach my daughters how important it is, to preserve the gift of self for the time our Lord has laid out for us, be it Marriage or Religious Life and not just cast ourselves wherever and whenever.

Getting back to the Vocation,  A call from God to a distinctive state of life, in which the person can reach holiness. With my Vocation in Marriage, I am called to help my husband get to heaven. As he is called in this Vocation, to help me get to heaven. Last year, we were so greatly attacked spiritually and physically, this call could have ended. Through the grace of our Lord, I held on tight knowing, His love, His mercy, His call, that there was no way, on my part, I could allow something like the demon of divorce to be allowed to part, what our Lord had placed together. The temptation to walk away came dangerously close, until I was able to see how “easy” the evil one was making it to leave. I dug in and held on to our Lord, and last weekend, my husband and I renewed our Marriage Vows. This was not something we planned or set up for us to do. I had accepted a fill in request to be an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion for the Saturday Holy Mass, which we very rarely attend, and it was a special event that had been a part of Saturdays Holy Mass, without prior knowledge of either of us.

Today, there is a report from Pope Francis:

Marriage prep should be more than just a few courses, Pope tells priests

 

I can not tell you how much support I have for this as I am one who truly believes that Marriage preparation begins in the home, the moment our children are given to us as parents. Formation is a life long process, which should be deeply taught to youth, before they even set out in search of a spouse.

I will leave this here, with a quote in which I find to be so true and one I see to, even today, in my current state of Life, in my Vocation of Marriage.

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Injustice Of Divorced And Remarried Receiving Holy Communion

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Pondering souls being granted full communion after Divorce and remarriage outside of the Church. SEE: Top Vatican Cardinal: Not Even A Pope Can Change Divine Law on Communion

Personal thoughts and ponderings as I have been here. See: Cohabitation And Holy Communion along with Gift Of Marriage and various other posts in this personal journey back to our Lord.

Knowingly granting full communion to any soul who does not admit error, without the process of Annulment, is unjust and an injustice to the souls in error.

The soul in error therefore is robbed of seeking and finding Divine Provence in the deeper meaning she or he has been called to find our Lord in.

The souls granting full communion to the soul, removing “punishment”, being separated from receiving our Lord in Holy Communion, are committing a grave error by becoming a stumbling block, as our Lord once called St. Peter for trying to stand in His way from what He must do, to the soul called to a deeper union with our Lord. I ponder the millstone placed around the neck of one who keeps one of this little children from Him. Far to often we forget that punishment due to our sinfulness is a grace, (purgative) which allows the soul to see a deeper Love of our Lord, and seek that full union. Separation makes the heart grow fonder. We must understand that this separation, no mater how painful in this life, through our own fault, is a temporary separation, in which we are called to a deepness of our Lord, that at any other time in our lives, would never have been found, without the grace of repentance.

Above is a deeper pondering from and earlier FB post I had made from a calling in my heart:

When punishment is removed IE. in regards to not being able to receive our Lord through our own fault (Mortal Sin) of marriage outside of the Church laws of Marriage, we remove the souls conscious of right and wrong, creating lukewarm souls, instead of souls on fire for our Lord to DO in Love for Him, what is right and just, by wanting to FIX what we have done wrong. We take away personal responsibility to encounter our Lord in the very simple act of turning from our fault, and turning to His mercy.

Please Read: The Church at the Service of the Family  – From St. John Paul II

FAMILIARIS CONSORTIO

Take from the above link:

Gradualness and Conversion

9. To the injustice originating from sin-which has profoundly penetrated the structures of today’s world-and often hindering the family’s full realization of itself and of its fundamental rights, we must all set ourselves in opposition through a conversion of mind and heart, following Christ Crucified by denying our own selfishness: such a conversion cannot fail to have a beneficial and renewing influence even on the structures of society.

What is needed is a continuous, permanent conversion which, while requiring an interior detachment from every evil and an adherence to good in its fullness, is brought about concretely in steps which lead us ever forward. Thus a dynamic process develops, one which advances gradually with the progressive integration of the gifts of God and the demands of His definitive and absolute love in the entire personal and social life of man. Therefore an educational growth process is necessary, in order that individual believers, families and peoples, even civilization itself, by beginning from what they have already received of the mystery of Christ, may patiently be led forward, arriving at a richer understanding and a fuller integration of this mystery in their lives.

 

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Sheep Rattle

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I promised my daughters that I would bring them something home from my Retreat this weekend. I purchased two sheep rattles on my way home. Although I knew what I was bringing them was much more than stuffed toys. What they can’t see yet, but I do clearly, is their mom is coming back with a firm guard on the lambs our Lord has given to me to give back to Him. Just as the Good Shepherd lays down His life for His sheep, so I must lay down my life for the lambs our Lord has entrusted me with, to care for until I can no longer. This is the job of a mom. This is the vocation of Motherhood. Yes, I care for all the souls placed in my life, but my top priority is for the two lambs in my own pen. As was my parents job when I was a “lamb”.

The story of my becoming aware of my conversion is one in which took place when my dad lay dying. When we are at a loss as to what we can do, our Lord is ever there to guide us. At that moment, as he was dying, I shook and prayed. Never thinking anything about it until it all became clear. We should never fear death, as we should only have fear of our Lord as we are living.

As I arrived home yesterday afternoon from the beautiful retreat, I handed my daughters their little sheep. A little while later my daughter Violet came to me as said with excitement “Mommy! It rattles!”.  Immediately the words flowed back to her. I began to tell her that she should always, for the rest of her life, remember and never forget that she has received our Lord in the Eucharist. That she was in fact a “sheep”. When ever she gets lost, no matter how far she walks away from our Lord, our Lord can hear her shake from the inside. The second she becomes afraid, she should remember that our Lord always knows where she is because she has Him everywhere she goes and just like that little rattling sheep, He hears her and will lead her back home too. She should never be afraid of the Shepherd and should tell Him everything through the sacrament of Reconciliation. In the Confessional, so she knows for a fact, He healed her when she gets into the tangles or covered in burs of sin, which are poisonous. Then to never get into those tangles again but to stay close to Him. Walking His path.

“Behold, I am sending you like sheep in the midst of wolves; so be shrewd as serpents and simple as doves.”

 

 

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Prayer For The Grace To Become A Priest

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O Lord Jesus Christ,
the great High Priest,
who dost call chosen souls to offer Thee in sacrifice
and to assist Thee in saving souls,
I beseech Thee to grant me this high grace
though I am most unworthy of it;
make me carefully to prepare my heart to receive it
and to keep myself pure and lowly
that Thou mayest call me to serve Thee at Thine altar.

Amen.

O Mary, Mother of God and my dear mother too,
obtain for me this grace from the Sacred Heart of thy dear
Son.

(Taken from Catholic Online)

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Help Needed! Young Man Wants To Join The Abbey

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I was contacted by Richard and asked to share this. What better way then on this blog. Glory to God! Lets do this! Please if you can help, even by sharing this, any little amount of Charity would help! Especially your prayers & sharing his story. We NEED Priests! Please help. God bless you.

Father, we’re your people, the work of your hands.
So precious are we in your sight that you sent your Son, Jesus.
Jesus calls us to heal the broken-hearted,
to dry the tears of those who mourn, to give hope to those who despair,
and to rejoice in your steadfast love.
We, the baptized, realize our call to serve.
Help us to know how.
Call forth from among us priests, sisters, brothers and lay ministers.
With our hearts you continue to love your people.
We ask this through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son,
who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit,
one God forever and ever. Amen

Read the comments from here

Pax Christi! My name is Richard Sullivan. I am 25 years old, and I have accepted God’s call to the postulancy at the Norbertine Order of St. Michael’s Abbey in Orange County, California. Please help me pay off $19,000 of student loans by May 13th, the Feast of Our Lady of Fatima.

By the time I was thirteen, I felt a call to God’s service in the Catholic priesthood. About two years ago, I felt this calling in my heart, stronger than ever. This path has been a beautiful one, full of God’s goodness and Love.

The Norbertines are an order based on community and sacrifice. They were founded by St. Norbert of Xanten, and follow the Rule of St. Augustine. “Priests from St. Michael’s Abbey give spiritual direction and retreats to many different religious communities in California, and internationally” (from website).

Daily life consists of praying the Divine Office, Mass, Rosary, and Eucharistic Adoration and Benediction. There is also a Prepatory High School on site where the members teach and serve. Please visit their website to learn more: http://www.stmichaelsabbey.com. If this goal is met, I will join the postulancy program on August 27th, the Feast of St. Monica.

It is no secret that college debt has been a hindrance to vocations. Despite working full time and supporting myself, the amount far exceeds what I can pay off in order to enter the Abbey. This is why I humbly ask you for help. Please support my answer to God’s call by donating $50-$250? However, any and all amounts are greatly appreciated. I have no doubts that God will see this goal met, as nothing is impossible for Him, and He can not be outdone in generosity. Be assured of my prayers and sincere gratitude. May God bless and keep you, and Our Lady keep you tucked safely under her mantle.

Here is the link to donate: Help Send Richard to the Abbey

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Prayer For Vocations: Trinitarians of Mary

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Becoming a priest or a man or woman religious is not primarily our own decision…. Rather it is the response to a call and to a call of love.
—Pope Francis, Address to Seminarians and Novices, July 6, 2013

Gracious God,
You have called me to life
and gifted me in many ways.
Through Baptism You have sent me
to continue the mission of Jesus
by sharing my love with others.
Strengthen me to respond to
Your call each day.
Help me to become all You desire of me.
Inspire me to make a difference in
others’ lives.
Lead me to choose the way of life
You have planned for me.
Open the hearts of all to listen
to Your call.
Fill all with Your Holy Spirit that
we may have listening hearts and
the courage to respond to You.
Enkindle in my heart
and the hearts of others the desire
to make the world a better place
by serving as
Lay Minister, Sister, Priest,
Brother or Deacon.
Amen.

KNOCK HERE to enter….

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Mission

Mission

Yesterday morning, as I was leaving my home to attend Holy Mass, I noticed in the driveway of my neighbor, some tables sitting out. I went back into my home and my husband had mentioned the tables. They were very nice and I loved the style. We were in need of new tables and to purchase something new was not in the immediate future as our finances are not that great. As I was about to leave, for Mass, my husband told me to ask the neighbor if he was selling them and ask him if we could purchase them.

Walking out I noticed my neighbor and had inquired about the tables. Much to my surprise they were very inexpensive and I informed him that we would purchase them. I left for Holy Mass.

Mass was simply beautiful. The presence of our Lord was so overwhelming that I could not stop smiling through the entire Mass. When Mass had ended, I came back home. As I was pulling into the driveway, I noticed the tables and I heard in my heart “Mission”. The style of the tables is “Mission”. I was full of so much joy! Here our Lord was telling me all about my mission. My “Mission” in life is this home in which He has placed me. My “Mission” is the children He has given to me to teach all about Him. My home is now understood as “My Mission”. My mission is to ensure my children are given the firm “Foundation” in the faith. With His grace, I accept His mission.

Today is Mission Sunday. May our Lord grant all of us His grace to understand we all have a “Mission” and we are all called to accept it, and continue to accomplish this “Mission”.

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Vocation Of Motherhood

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Ever since my conversion began back in 1998, I have been struggling with the idea that I could somehow be a mom and faithful to our Lord as I have been called. Last night as I was washing dishes I realized just how seriously under attack I had been over the years by the evil one, and still am.

I learned last night one of the most evil things to ponder is, “If I would have” or “I should have never” in regards to setting my life completely on religious life, rather than on the family I have been blessed with, all leading to ponder regrets. I have been plagued by this thought since the beginning, only now realizing this is not the voice of our Lord. This is the voice of the Culture of Death saying don’t have children, pursue YOUR selfish wants. Take care of YOU first.

It’s no different then the woman who puts off marriage and children to advance her career to become something other than what she was created to be. Constantly chasing after that carrot on the stick that she could never get to take a bite of because as you move forward, the stick carrying that carrot, moves at the same pace. Leading us to haul a bigger cart of misery and regrets, “Oh if I had married that man who loved me I would have a family by now”.

Our Lord never moves the goal posts. He moves the players to enable them to score the touchdown. The evil one constantly moves the goal posts making it impossible to score, no matter how much effort you put into the play. You could be wide open, receive the ball and just about to cross the goal and with every step, the goal becomes further and further out of reach. In the end, you never score. No matter how many times you try.

The gift of my family and the vocation of Marriage and Motherhood, is what needs to be placed first and when we place them above what we are searching for, and place ourselves last, we quickly understand our Lord is present in our own homes, waiting for that hug, to be tucked into bed, to be told to brush teeth and to pray with. Every action that has been done to pull closer to our Lord outside of the home, is brought into the home to be shared so in turn they can share it with their children.

In all religious communities, the soul seeks to live in communion with others, seeking the same goal, to score one for our Lord. Its teamwork on the spiritual level and the hardest part of this Vocation of Marriage and Motherhood, outside of the Religious Life, is knowing without a doubt we are all on the same team, and our goal is to ensure, not that I score the touchdown, but that the one of us does, so we all give the glory to God. Not to live and play on the team of the Culture of Death, where life is frowned upon, but rather the Culture of Life, to allow all God’s creation to continue.

Thank you Mama Mary, Queen of Heaven, on this day of your Nativity for this day to understand that we all have a bigger role to play in God’s plans and with humility and casting away self, to raise the next generation, allowing us to see life through His eyes and understand the smaller we become, the bigger the plans He has for us. I ask you to cover all mothers with your mantle, that they may be guided by your perfection in all motherly ways. Our Lady of Mount Carmel, pray for us. Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us all.

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No More Fish Bowl

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I would love to say that this will be my last post on this blog, but I just can’t do that yet. Not until I see our Lord face to Face. I am however, taking a break from Facebook, twitter and blogging to be mom. To adhere to my first vocation. Wife and mom. Since the Marriage of myself and my husband in the Catholic Church back on May 4, 2013, there have been many serious changes taking place in my life. Due to being asked to do something I could not do because of my faith in our Lord, I believe I have been presented with an exit from our Lord to leave the ministry’s behind at my old parish as nothing was being addressed as far as concerns for them and the people of my old parish. A door became open for me to leave and I did just that. I am still in formation for the Third Order of Carmel and will remain with it as long as our Lord is calling me to this beautiful place. I still attend Adoration and will continue as He is my love. It has been almost a week and all the things I had been asking for, for the benefit of the ministry’s after my leaving, is now, as I hear, taking place. Sometimes we stand in the way of progress and don’t even know it until our Lord moves us to another place, still in His heart. I was asked to say in them as the reason of my departure was a misunderstanding. Rather then go back, where I knew nothing would change for the better of the community, I left the door open and kept walking. I am now at a new parish as truly feel our Lord calling me to do EVERYTHING I had done at my old parish, in love for Him, and do it now in my own home for my children, husband and maybe down the road, where He is calling me to. I feel at this time I need to keep many things in my heart but still be a shinning light for my family in the faith. Until He calls me to write again.

In many ways I began to feel as if I was outgrowing this “Fish Bowl”. I could no longer attend Holy Mass without someone coming up to me with a question during Holy Mass and that was just too much for me. I live to help others, but not at the expense of the Holy Mass, the faith or our Lord. If a soul is being called to distract another DURING Mass for any question, then the help they need is much greater than I can give. Yes, He is removing me from “This Fishbowl” and placing me in a much bigger one, free from the nibbling and picking on in a much larger tank. Free to worship again. I forgive them and pray always for everyone… Thy will be done O Lord. Thy will.

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Lost And Found


MISSING

Lost Soul

Last seen coated in mortal sin.  Heading for eternal damnation.
Taken by a “Thief In The Night”
No Reward. Not interested in her return.
Good Riddance

I have finally reached a very comfortable point on my road back home. Funny how I can’t even look at photos of myself without thanking God for my conversion. The photos bring back memories that make me realize just how lost I truly was. It to me is a testament to God’s mercy.

I found a photo of my husband and I, just weeks after we had met. I have been praying so intently for a personal issue to God concerning my husband & I and this evening at dinner with my girls, I believe He answered me.

I have been struggling so hard with the “What If” factor regarding “Did I miss my chance God?” The “Chance”? Rather then the vocation of Marriage, dedicating my entire life to God as a religious Sister. There is NO DOUBT I would join a religious order if events in my life were different. Or should I say, if I had not had such a hardened heart once upon a time. I can say without a doubt, my husband was placed in my life, so I could HEAR God calling to me. It was the only way for Him to get my attention. He tried everything else. I just didn’t listen. Now the price I pay, is realizing that I belong to God and would have no problem dedicating my life to Him, but now have my husband under circumstances NOT in line with Catholic teaching.

I was married in the Catholic Church when I was 20 and pregnant. I won’t go into details, but I will say, I didn’t want to do it. I was married for less then six months before papers were filed for a civil divorce. I was divorced just before my 21st birthday. I never filed for an annulment in the Catholic Church, until 2 1/2 years ago. I married my current husband in of ALL places, Caesars Palace, Vegas, Nevada. If your rolling your eyes, I am too. Its not bad enough I divorced and remarried but to get married THERE? “Render unto Caesar”.

Lets bring God back into this post. I don’t believe for a second, our Lord was very happy with me at this union in such a way. As a matter of fact, I know He wasn’t. I should have followed the correct path by filing for the annulment, waiting, THEN having the marriage performed in the Catholic Church. Be it that He was not happy, through His mercy, he blessed us with three children anyway. One we lost while I was at just 7 weeks pregnant, who was a twin to my youngest Chloe. It was through the children God blessed us with, I started remembering how important faith was and started back on the road to Him, after another brief diversion.

As it stands now, my husband & I have been living as brother and sister since my total conversion back to the Catholic Church, until the annulment is complete and a decision is reached. Our relationship is based completely on trust and faith in God. It is not a easy life and it is full of many difficulty’s but its the right thing to do in regards to “Obedience” to God. Its an understood “Chastity” between two people who understand God comes first. I thank God for placing him in my life to get my attention. We have already decided that if the outcome is not in our favor, we will continue to live in this way, as brother and sister, until our children are grown. Then I will dedicate my life to a religious order. If they will take me.

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