Invalid Marriages


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I’m not buying the headlines today. Are Many Marriages Today Invalid? January 29th, 2005, I married my husband in Cesar’s Palace Las Vegas. Being Roman Catholic and he Greek Orthodox, it wasn’t until my serious conversion of heart, I took into account how serious of an offence this was against our Lord. We had both been married before. I love this man tremendously. Please read Cohabitation And Holy Communion, in which I have spoken about this before.

Today, after being married in the Catholic Church on May 4th, 20013, which I hold very dear to my heart and soul, we are continuing on in our marriage after a serious threat to all marriage. That being infidelity. I will not go into detail as the wounds are deep and we need time, prayers and patience to heal from this. I have forgiven my spouse and meant it. As I have also forgiven the other soul involved. We came very close to divorce. So close that we were just one day away from filing. It was pride and anger that lead to the decision to grab hold of an attorney and it was humility and love that made the decision to forgive and work through all the pain and suffering to continue on. The one thing for me that I just couldn’t stop pondering was how so many today “pretend”. Pretend everything. Marriage is not pretend. Vows are not pretend. The Church is not pretend. Our Lord is not pretend.

Back on June 3rd, the weekend before our filing was to be done, I prayed through the Immaculate Heart of Mary to our Lords Sacred Heart and I wrote:

What’s funny is, in all this divorce stuff, does a torn up piece of paper by the state mean anything to God? You can spend thousands of dollars in court to get a divorce and it can never amount to one drop of our Lord’s blood and a vow made with Him. So..Nope. I don’t believe it does. I made a vow to our Lord and Mark in the Church and I intend to keep it with God. I didn’t go through the annulment process and marry my husband in the church to have the state say your no longer married. My door will always be open for Mark to return, if he so chooses, and I pray our Lord converts his heart as He has mine, but I’m not holding my breath. So lets flush 20K down the toilet and Mark can continue to pretend he is not married. I will live still, as I know, I still am. End of story. Peace.

When I sought my attorney, so many signs were present. It was so easy to get one. It was even easy for this unemployed mother with no income to obtain a five thousand dollar retainer for them when we had been financially strapped for years. Something was wrong with this. It was far to easy and happening way to fast. This I knew in my heart was not from our Lord. I had heard in my heart that God hates divorce.

The following day, my husband moved back home with us and the process of healing began. As it is still today and will be for some time. I love him very much. As I love our Lord very much. And our Lord loves each of us first.

All I can say today, when I took my vow, I meant every word. I always intended to hold true to that vow no matter what. Even today under the serious issues we have faced and the continuing fallout from them. I said it before and I will say it again. I meant EVERY WORD of my vow to my husband and our Lord and I will never allow the state, if my husband should choose to leave and divorce me, to say that I am no longer married when it was to God, my husband and the state that I professed my vows of Marriage. Even if it should mean to live in a state of chastity and celibacy, we are called to that same chastity IN the sacrament of Marriage and being single. We are living in a world of souls playing “make believe” where nothing really matters and nothing means anything which couldn’t be farther from the Truth. The Truth is, humility, love, commitment, integrity and sincerity is needed for any Marriage to succeed. Beatitudes are to be lived. No matter what happens. That vow is also to our Lord. Look and see what our Lord said about how a man should love his wife and how a woman should love her husband and DO IT. Do it as your souls are Married to our Lord and live the vow as you are Married to our Lord. St. Thomas More, pray for us.

St. Monica pray for us.
St. Rita Of Cascia, pray for us.
Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us
Sacred Heart of Jesus, I place all my trust in you
Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us all

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Healing Deep Wounds


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When we forgive, it stops all the pain caused by the one you are forgiving. It does not however, clean up the mess that was made in how you have been hurt. The person you forgive can no longer cause you any more hurt. The damage is already done. Its what we choose to do with that pain that makes all the difference. When we choose to join that pain with our Lords, it becomes very easy to heal from it. Even in regards to infidelity in marriage.

Although many emotions are flying around and the soul truly feels as if it is on a roller caster it can’t seem to get off, that it doesn’t want to be on, nor asked to get on, forgiveness eases the feelings of being angry, sick, irritated, betrayed, devastated, insignificant and yes, even quieting the need to see the red flags that passed by without noticing.

Spouse sold you? Pretended they didn’t for as long as they were with you? Pretended to love you? Caused you to lose everything? Others persecuted you for it? Crucified you? Yes, our Lord is there with you as it happened to Him first.

[Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.”] They divided his garments by casting lots.

When we forgive, we choose mercy for the soul’s we are forgiving. We are not giving them a pass. We give ourselves the pass by choosing not to become exactly that which wounded us.

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Forgiveness And Family Reconciliation


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Very timely pondering from my retreat which took place on April 15 through the 17 that truly needs to be shared. May it bring healing to many.

Forgiveness and Family Reconciliation

[Adapted and reorganized from personal notes from a talk given by Fr. Peter Mary on 16 April 2016 as part of a retreat given at the El Carmelo Retreat House in Redlands, California.]

Question:

Do I have someone I need to forgive? Do I need to forgive myself?

How do I begin the process of forgiveness?

We are obligated to be merciful because God was merciful to us first.

Repay God’s mercy to us by being merciful to others.

The Lord’s Prayer (Mt 6:5-15) is explicit. Our forgiveness from the Father is conditioned upon our forgiveness of others.

St. Teresa of Avila’s Way of Perfection (chap. 36).

Defining Forgiveness:

What Forgiveness Is:

Forgiveness is act of will and intellect.

Forgiveness is a process which takes time and practice. That’s why it seems hard.

Forgiveness is a free gift.

It does not depend upon the actions or response of the offender.

It is distinct from reconciliation, a further step, which includes the offender.

What Forgiveness Is Not:

Forgiveness is separate from any need to challenge the offender’s destructive behavior.

Forgiveness does not guarantee we forget.

Forgiveness does not remove the pain.

Fruits of Forgiveness:

Forgiving leads to joyful living and peace.

Not forgiving leads to other problems.

It can lead to loneliness and isolation due to an inability to trust others.

It can destroy clear thinking.

It can destroy physical and mental health. The body and mind are connected.

Recognizing Who to forgive:

Consider the people within your own family.

Consider the people you need to forgive.

Consider the people who annoy you.

It is not possible to completely avoid people who annoy us. Trying to ignore them leads to loneliness and isolation.

We need to transform the annoyances.

Principles for Practicing Forgiveness:

Recognize you could be wrong or have misunderstood.

Take into account the difficulties the offender might have had in their life.

Weak offenders may be incapable of forgiving. Forgiveness does not depend upon the offender reciprocating.

Be careful not to limit forgiveness by placing conditions.

Recall how Jesus embraced the pain of his passion and the cross.

Good can come out of evil especially if we imitate the cross. We need to transform evil. (purification of memories is dealt by St John of the Cross in the Ascent.)

Forgive the offender immediately.

Depend upon God’s love to empower your forgiveness.

Nine Practices to Develop Forgiveness:

1. Pray for those you need to forgive.

2. Pray for your ability to forgive.

3. Receive regular confession in gratitude for God’s mercy on you.

4. Receive regular reception of the Eucharist for God’s mercy to be present within you.

5. Become more aware of a tendency to see only the bad in people and strive to see the good.

6. Imagine yourself into the other person’s situation and the pain and hurt they may have felt.

7. Avoid unreasonable expectations of yourself and others.

8. Be honest about yourself that you could be wrong.

9. Examine your conscience to recognize progress.

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St. Simon Stock


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Its not the cloth, nor the promise made, nor the prestige, nor the fame of the name. None of these can bring us love and life in Christ. Its the life in Love we choose to give and live in total contemplation, prayer for our Lord through our beautiful Mother.

St. Simon Stock Pray for Us

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Prayers Please


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I am requesting prayers please, for my children and myself during a very trying difficult time. Forgive me for not updating my blog in recent days, as I am in the midst of a very serious marital issue which is leading to separation. I ask you also to pray for the conversion of heart of my husband Mark.

Thank you.

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Business At Hand


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If its not about our Lord and His business, its a distraction away from our Lord and His business and simply not worth anything. Attend to the business at hand.

Matthew 3:2

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Out Of Time, Space, Matter


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Needed to share – There is only one God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit

“To one who has faith, no explanation is necessary. To one without faith, no explanation is possible.” – St. Thomas Aquinas

It would do all society a great service, for Summa Theological to be required study.

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